Business Cards.

I walked to the moon.

It took a while. But it was worth it. Now I'm going to walk back to Earth.

U.S. is playing war games outside Iran today. Wish I could play. I wasn't invited. Although there probably was an open invitation to anyone who wanted to attend. I forgot to respond to the E-Vite. Or I responded to the E-Vite and added (+57). Don't you hate when jokers do that? Whatever happened to E-Vites? They were fun while they lasted. I never read half of them, but I used to like to just respond so people would think it's funny. Like, "I'll be there" and then I wouldn't show up because I would forget to go. Or forget to put it in my palm pilot. I don't really own a palm pilot. I have a cellphone.

Anyway, U.S. said the war games weren't in response to the Iran capturing of British sailors. Instead they said the war games were happening just because the weather is nice out. And there's really not much to do. Except show off their Hummers. In high school, kids used to go to the Exxon in Warwick, and show off their souped up Civics. That was kinda like a high school war game. I used to go in my Duster and run everyone over. Then I'd set the gas station on fire. I usually won the war games. All it takes is a Plymouth Duster with a 380-6 pack.

I've had it with Iran and Iraq and the USA. When I say "I've had it" it really doesn't mean much of anything. The news is nothing more than a splinter in my eyelid. Just pull it out, and move on. Like, CNN sent me the update on Anna Nicole Smith. And, it was confusing. Case closed. Not suicide. Like, is anyone listening. If it wasn't suicide, was it murder? Most suicides aren't really suicide. Unless the autopsy report says that it is. Like KC. He didn't kill himself. The bullet did. Not suicide. Case closed.

Anyway, who cares. There may be a WW3. There may not be. I might go if it gets real bad. I'll respond to the Army E-Vite. Just so I can hitch hike to the bottom of the Caspian Sea. To see if I can find Nemo. And a pot of gold.

The world is a dumb place. It's not that dumb really, it is what you make it. And if you don't have anything nice to say. Don't say anything at all.

My dad carries a Monopoly "Get out of jail free card" in his wallet from 1972. It's the business.